It's Okay!

It's Okay!

I was watching "Failure to Launch" (What a surprise! A woman watching a "chick flick") Lol! Though it's not by any means my favorite genre of movies, I do occasionally indulge. There was a scene where there's a black couple watching the main couple makeup. The black man made the statement "I don't usually like reality shows, but this is so emotional!" All the while with tears in his eyes. His companion in turn looked at him and said "Are those tears in your eyes?" Basically ridiculing him for showing heartfelt emotion. It made me think... why is it soooo frowned upon, damn near taboo for men to cry or show an emotional, other than joy or anger? 

Think about it. When a man displays an emotion that's heartfelt or romantic, some if not most of society automatically thinks... "Oh, he must be gay", "Geeze! Someone's being a drama queen!" or "You need to man up!" My question is why displaying emotion, synonymous to being female or having more estrogenic qualities? Are men not human?

 In complete and total honesty, I myself hate crying. Eventhough I'm a woman, so somehow my gender grants me this special pass to do so and not be judged or ridiculed as harshly. It's a double standard that needs to stop. We're ingraining in our sons that crying is wrong. That crying makes you less than a man. Basically we're teaching that men need to be less than human. Yet women are looking for a man with sensitivity? Really?!

So let me get this straight. 

1. Men aren't accepted as being "manly" if they show emotion other than joy or anger.

2. We ladies, want a man to understand and empathize with our feelings. (Nevermind in order to empathize, you may have to experience those feelings)

3. So basically we want a gentleman/thug, that doesn't show a range of emotion, but has to understand ours.

All righty then! Are you men ready to sign up?

Do Wounds Heal?

Do Wounds Heal?

They say time heals all wounds. But is that true? Or is that something we tell our friends, loved ones & ourselves to make them & us feel better?

Yes! Some wounds do heal, but what about the deep ones? Like betrayal, losing someone close or unrequited love? Can time heal those? Also, how much time does it take? 

Do we really heal? Or do those wounds just scab over? Leaving a hideous scar on our souls, all the while we're hemorrhaging internally, dying a slow death. Putting on a fake smile to the world, cause no one could truly understand what we're feeling. Just thinking about what scarred you, bringing tears to your eyes. That lump forming in your throat. All those feelings come rushing back, crashing over you like a tidal wave. Feeling like you're pushed back to square one, to "get over it" once again.

Most would say "Well, you're making the choice to wallow in that pain". Maybe. It's possible. Or am I being honest about what we're afraid to admit? It's true some of us are much stronger than others & better at masking our pain. But even the strongest person can only be so fucking strong for so fucking long. We all eventually break down, lose faith, question who we are & cry out "How much more shit do I have to take?" The last thing you wanna fucking hear is "Time heals all wounds". 

No! What'll happen is you'll internalize that pain & try not to think about it anymore. Another deep gash in the amour. Hoping this one isn't the one that kills you.